I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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