my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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