It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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