I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
