Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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