Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I wish you could order shots online.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
