I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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