and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
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