he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Randomize
