check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Randomize
