I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
