Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Randomize
