Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
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I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
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Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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