Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize