I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize
