Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Randomize