i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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