"it" just moved
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Randomize
