it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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