You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
