Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
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