fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
i out mim tonsoeep
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