if only i could text you this smell
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize
