I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
21 Of The Most Regrettable Tattoo Ideas Ever
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...