I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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