Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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