Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
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I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
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Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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