I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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