i already hear my dad disowning me
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
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This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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