yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Randomize
