I hope mine doesn't look like that
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
