I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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