I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
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I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
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I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I have aggressive nipples.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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