Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
