Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
He did a backflip because drugs
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
