Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
