That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
