I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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