I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
