The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
