You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
