Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
