We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
