Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Randomize
