OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Also, beer. Big fan.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Randomize
