We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
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