I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize