ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
