I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
