So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize
